Veronica Roberts

A slightly satirical slant:The funny side of serious

Mitt Romney accepted his party's nomination for president at last month's GOP convention in Tampa, and the campaign is in full last lap mode. His wife Ann has already told us what time it is when she said to ABC's Robin Roberts that "you people" have seen all you need to know about their tax returns.

Apparently some haven't gotten that memo and are still keen on the scent of the missing "papers." One such sleuth is Hustler magazine owner Larry Flynt, who is reportedly offering a cool $1 million to anyone who can point him in the direction of those mysterious tax returns, as well as any info on his offshore money vacationing in the Swiss Alps and the beautiful Caribbean islands.

According to Forbes, Flynt has taken out huge ads in the Washington Post and the USA Today, for he wants to know what Mittens is hiding.

Read more here:Hustler's Larry Flynt Offers $1M Reward For Mitt Romney's Tax Returns.

We all know Flynt is in the adult entertainment industry and another adult entertainer has taken another route. While Flynt wants to expose the Republican presidential nominee Romney, porn star Jenna Jameson, has endorsed him. (Read it at The New York Daily News).

She reportedly said the former Bain Capital-Massachusetts governor is "better for rich people." Some have said they both know how to screw the America people and come out wealthy because of it. Ouch!

Read more on porn queen Jameson here:

Since hearing this news, I have dusted off my snowmobile and scuba gear to take up the challenge.

First stop is the Cayman Islands, for I have a few connections in that Caribbean paradise. I am preparing for every contingency and know I may have to do some deep sea diving. By now those "papers" can be anywhere: buried in a strongbox far below the warm, azure waters or deep in the bank vaults protected by all the muscle big money can buy--and they can buy plenty on those small, breathtakingly beautfiful but sadly impoverished isles.

I also plan on braving the cold Zurich vaults and though I am not looking forward to the cold, a thorough P.I. cannot leave any stone unturned. To use the favorite line of politicians from both side of the aisles, "the American people" deserve to know the truth about a potential president's financial dealings. Plus, a million dollars is quite a bonus. While there, I will certainly look to see which of our other politicians may have sent their money on tax evasion vacations. Something tells me the list is long.

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